> A far-off memory

~~Sunday, May 17, 2009~~

8:32 AM

Day by day, the flame in my heart is dimmishing. today seemed worst? As i know, i am nt perfect too. Thus i hav always been quite unsuccesive most of the time. As far as i know, i hate losing. Nt games but reality things. Family, relatives, teachers, teammates, friends, classmates and most of all "loveones in my live". Finally i hav been crippled. I feel lik i cant move on anymore? Life seems so bad at times. But i myself know that life is nt perfect. I dont believe in gamble as i always lose[ lack of luck maybe?] nor bet. Thx for the truth and i really appciate it. I will be stronger and Move on. Time is nv waiting. Now i seriously need some space to reflect, and to calm my little self, just a small little time for me to be back to normal. i can of course control my emotions as i am big enough, but my body is just shutting down. my mind is pretty blank now. Seemed no any direction or path for me to choose. No any thinny winni chances... I am tired, real tired now... Let me rest for some days and i may be normal again. Hahas ;D

From wad i know abt myself, my choice will nt change. I am a person, weird maybe? but i only go for the choice i wan. i would giv it all my best shot even if there is no slightest chance. Stupid maybe?yea somethings when i think, its really stupid but thats me, as i am true and seriously true. The words i said was nv a lie. when i am true towards u, i am really only thinking about u. Mad or wad, how can it be possible? but i do know that its bad to play with ppl's heart therefore i will only hav that choice. No matter how weakly my flame is burning, if the flame is still nt put out, I will nv ever giv up! I promise i will just wait, wait and wait for that 1 fine little day to come. If it nv come, i will still move on with my own stupid thoughts, thinking that that day would surely come. I dont care wad other ppl tell me or how they discriminate u, but to me, u are just the u. Nth i say now will change my life now... just let me rest for awhile. Feeling so upset that i am. Hahas i still can laugh though, but it may nt be that real laugh from before. Dont say i am Emo as i am just bottling up my feelings so that i dont show people how weak i really am.
Ok haha it seems that i have written a compo Lols -.-lll i will continue tomorrow bahs~ Gd nite

Labels: and only u..., my thoughts will still be u

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